It's Worth It!

Learning to work hard and lovin' it!

Well, so much for my lofty plans of once-a-week blogging. I’ve blogged in my head, does that count? Perhaps I'll try for once-a-month blogging. Grass keeps growing and life keeps coming at us at an alarming pace. We spent last weekend working at our church camp grounds. It’s hot grueling work and every year I think most adults look at each other and think, “What are we doing spending a perfectly beautiful weekend breaking our backs?” And so after a couple days of hard work it was with aching muscles and calloused hands that we got into our air conditioned van to come home.

The boys saw the weekend through totally different eyes. They think of our work weekends at Mode Camp as nothing short of a real holiday. We actually have them join in on some of the work, but that doesn’t for a moment inhibit their absolute joy any time we drive onto the grounds. I asked the boys what it is they love so much about Mode Camp and Josiah’s response surprised me. He said, “I love the freedom best.” I asked him what he meant and he explained, “I just love getting to walk around in such a big place on my own.” In all honesty his response perplexed me at first. Is it healthy at such a young age to desire freedom? Or are we smothering our children? I spoke with Matt about my concerns and he quickly informed me

that he well remembers the exhilaration as a child of walking around camp “on his own”. The more we talked and I thought, I realized that I really appreciate Josiah’s response.

Matt and I are not the kind of parents that leave our young children “on their own”. We would never dream of dropping them off for library time, homeschool group activities or music lessons. We think it is very important at their ages to closely guard influences and monitor their behavior. Our church doesn’t hold to the philosophy of segregated worship or learning. During the Sunday School hour there is a children’s class, but our young people join in with the adults once they are ready to leave the children’s class. And we see the benefits of multi-generational relationships as a result of this approach. Our family doesn’t do sleepovers with other kids or even much unsupervised playtime with other children. (Disclaimer: this is not an essay on how you should personally run your church or home. You have my permission to do things differently.) However, for 10 days out of the year we do send our kids off to “children’s church” and when the boys are old enough and mature enough they will be allowed to stay in the boy’s dorm during camp. Are we being hypocritical for 10 days? No, I don’t think so and here’s why.

Mode Camp is a safe place for our boys to “stretch their wings” a bit. What they perceive as freedom is still very carefully monitored. In all of the parenting material we have digested over the years we still come back to an analogy that we find so helpful from the book entitled “Child Wise”. It pictures parenting as a funnel. The narrow part of the funnel represents the child at birth. All of his choices etc. are made by his parents. There is no freedom or independence at this stage. But as the child grows, and as a trusting relationship with his parents deepens, the funnel widens. Until at last by the teen years there is very little restraint on the child from the parents, but he is now governed by self restraint and hopefully his relationship with God.

What better place then at camp when our boys are surrounded by our trusted friends to give a little room in the funnel? What an opportunity for Matt and I to observe and study our boys, watching to see if they are indeed ready for more freedom or how they behave when they think no one is watching. And oh how they love it. Not just the freedom, but the fun of spending hour after hour with so many Christian brothers and sisters young and old. And while admittedly at their ages the pews get hot and hard after a long sermon, their little souls are being fed. Maybe not so much from the sermons yet, but from observing the lives of those they see in the pews around them. At camp, relationships are built and strengthened in a way that the business of everyday life very seldom affords. I firmly believe that a relationship of trust is an extremely powerful tool with which to influence another for Christ. In light of that, even the "fun and games" of camp serves a purpose.

And so in reflecting on all that, I was reminded of why we do what we do. It makes perfect sense that we are spending beautiful weekends breaking our backs. And when I start to question if the work is really worth it, I have only to look into the faces of my children. It's definitely worth it.

Strength to Stand

Matt and I are very interested in the persecuted church. We receive the Voice of the Martyrs newsletter every month and our hearts are always moved by the trials of our brothers and sisters. A few months ago the cover of VOM had a 10 year old girl named Namrata on it. Her little face had been burned. Her great crime and reason for her charred flesh was because she was a believer. Her testimony was beautiful, full of forgiveness and hope. In spite of the pain and the shadow of death that continually looms over her little life, her faith is strong.

I just read the report of the horrific torture of Gao Zhisheng. I was brought to tears reading all our brother had endured and may still be enduring. I was overwhelmingly thankful for the freedoms I enjoy. If you stop and look at history you will see how time and again freedoms never disappear overnight. It is the slow erosion of a culture. A complacent acceptance of the sirens call to change. It frightens me to hear Christians say it is not our place as believers to stand up against the erosion of our culture. It only takes a glance back at the history of the world to show us the devastating ruins of good people doing nothing. Thank God for the Dietrich Bonhoeffers and Gao Zhishengs of the world. But I digress.

The thought that has weighed the most on my mind is how well would I withstand in the face of such torture? Am I preparing my children to have the kind of faith I saw in the face of little Namrata? A few Sundays ago we were visiting a church. We enjoyed the service, but something struck me during the song service. We sang a few token hymns presumably for the "old people". The song leader stopped us in the middle of "A Mighty Fortress is Our God" and said, "Can we pick this up a little? If we don't, this song just drags on." Musically I understand what he was saying. But it seemed to me the message of the song seemed to be being missed, we were just getting it "over with". Then we moved on to the praise songs and while I enjoyed them, the lyrics were a bit repetitive. And while they inspired good feelings(which aint all bad) the challenge and encouragement found in Luther's hymn was not as evident in the praise choruses. During this portion of the singing we were encouraged to "think of the words" and worship. Now before you get your boxing gloves on, this is NOT intended to be a argument of hymns vs praise music. Neither is this a criticism of the service or the music minister of the church we visited. I gave the background because it was a catalyst of thought for me. I asked myself what would sustain me or my children in the face of persecution? Have we fed them so much ease and feel good theology that they would immediately crumble into the "why me Lord?" mentality when faced with discomfort.

I don't have all the answers to my questions, I'm really just thinking out loud here. I pray we never face in America what Gao is facing in China or what Namrata faced in India or what little Mark in Iraq is facing everyday at school. But should that day come, I wonder if we would be sustained by an understanding that others have faced this and more and stood strong for Christ. Would a knowledge of Luther's world and how powerful his song was in light of what he was facing bring us encouragement? Would the powerful trust of being eternally protected by our Mighty Fortress call to our memories scriptures of promise from our Savior? And so Matt and I are trying to actively prepare our family for whatever may come. To prepare our hearts and minds to lean hard upon Jesus in times of trial. Be that in a jail cell or in a peer group.

1. A mighty fortress is our God,
a bulwark never failing;
our helper he amid the flood
of mortal ills prevailing.
For still our ancient foe
doth seek to work us woe;
his craft and power are great,
and armed with cruel hate,
on earth is not his equal.

2. Did we in our own strength confide,
our striving would be losing,
were not the right man on our side,
the man of God's own choosing.
Dost ask who that may be?
Christ Jesus, it is he;
Lord Sabaoth, his name,
from age to age the same,
and he must win the battle.

3. And though this world, with devils filled,
should threaten to undo us,
we will not fear, for God hath willed
his truth to triumph through us.
The Prince of Darkness grim,
we tremble not for him;
his rage we can endure,
for lo, his doom is sure;
one little word shall fell him.

4. That word above all earthly powers,
no thanks to them, abideth;
the Spirit and the gifts are ours,
thru him who with us sideth.
Let goods and kindred go,
this mortal life also;
the body they may kill;
God's truth abideth still;
his kingdom is forever.

For Mom

Mom,

The yellow climbing roses have finally bloomed! You can hardly see the electric meter under there. :)

Mothers, Daughters, and Chocolate

Saturday night my amazing friend Becca hosted a Mother/Daughter dinner for our church ladies. It was wonderful! She had two menu choices that she prepared herself, complete with fine service from some of our young men. The theme of the dinner was chocolate and friendship. Sounds perfect for a girl's gathering huh? Becca asked me to give a short devotional. Below is my "little offering" and I thought I'd share it with my blog girlfriends too. (I handed out chocolates before my talk. None of the ladies knew what "filling" her chocolate held.)

As the infamous Forest Gump would say, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get." I’ve never seen the movie myself, but there is some truth to what Forest had to say. Life rarely turns out the way any of us planned when we were dreaming it out as young girls. And yet we do have a choice with what we will do with the reality we have. We can hold on to those youthful dreams and demand that life give us what we want. OR we can surrender those dreams to God and let Him give us a life that far surpasses anything we could have dreamed. Don’t get me wrong, I don't think that necessarily means an easy life or even a happy life. But experience has taught me that following God has led to the most fulfilling, joyful, peaceful life imaginable.

Another aspect of life we can learn from a box of chocolates is how our expectations can greatly affect our lives. For those of you expecting a caramel and you ended up with a fruit center didn’t you somehow feel a bit cheated? Your expectations led you to believe something that wasn’t true. Even if you enjoyed the fruit filling and even though the candy was given free of charge our emotions can end up sending us spiraling downward. I have to constantly remind myself when I feel disappointed or dissatisfied with life that I haven’t been cheated or let down by anyone. I have created a reality in my own mind that doesn’t exist. I’m trying to make the world around me live up to my expectations. This, my dear friends, is a recipe for misery. I heard a radio preacher once say, "Expect more from yourself and less from those around you." I think if we practiced that principle we would find ourselves living a much more contented life.

There are many lessons we could take from a chocolate box, but the one I’d like to focus on today is how a box of chocolates, can be like the Body of Christ. While I love the caramels in the box, a whole box of caramels would be unbalanced. Do you wonder if the chocolate almonds ever look over at the cherry cordials and say, "Wow, I wish I could drip when people bit into me like she does! It’s so much more valuable to be a cherry than an almond." I can hear the chocolate creams wishing they were as well shaped as the thin mint patties. The box of chocolate would never fulfill the needs of a whole family if they were all the same. And it is an insane waste of time for the orange creams to wish they were bon bons. It is the beautiful variety in the box of chocolates that helps make the package complete.

Paul admonishes the Corinthians in 2 Cor 10:12 …"but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise". While we share so many of the same values, likes, and dislikes not one of us is in the exact same place in life. Some of us have older children, some young, some none. Some of us are married, some single. Some of us come from large families and some of us are only children. We work at home, in offices, factories, hospitals the list could go on and on. The point is, we accomplish nothing by trying to compare our situation in life with somebody else’s. I find myself wishing to be as organized or as disciplined, or as creative, or as productive, or as intelligent as all of you. And where does that lead me? I end up trying so hard to be like somebody else that I’m not being all that God wants me to be.

Don’t get me wrong I believe there is power in being challenged to be more than what comes naturally for me. I know the slippery slope of being in a situation where you feel you are the "top dog". Here's a hypothetical: I go to the Dr's office and there are 3 other mother’s there with their children. Their children are wretched. Screaming, climbing and biting. There sits my "perfect little angels". Because of some strange aligning of the planets they are good today, sitting quietly reading books. The other mother’s look at me as if my super hero cape is flapping in the breeze. It’s tempting to think, "Wow, I’m doing OK here." That kind of thinking is just craziness people. The reality is my "little angels" have really devilish days too. Any "success" I may have in any area of my life is a result of the influence of someone else. I have been blessed to be surrounded by godly people who have helped me learn and grow. I NEED to be challenged. I need sisters in Christ who are overcoming in areas in which I am weak. I learn from your lives more than I’ve learned in many years of sermons. The search light of the Holy Spirit using your lives to reveal my own grim is much different than my own measuring stick of comparisons.

If we had time to ask each lady in this room "how together" she has her life, I’d be willing to bet every one of us is working hand in hand with God to refine some character trait in our lives. And every one of us has had a laundry basket unfolded, a junk drawer in chaos, or a frozen pizza dinner with no vegetable in sight to feed our families. By God’s grace we are growing together. Where one is weak another is strong. As a Body, or as a box of chocolates, we can delight in each sister’s strength, and use our own strength to bless others. We can use Christ’s measuring stick in our lives and be thankful for the encouragement we can gain from each other to do more, be more, and live more for Jesus.

I Miss My Blog

I miss blogging. I miss reading your blogs. Facebook is fun and quick. It helps me to keep in some sort of contact, albeit a very shallow form of contact. It's nice, but I miss blogging. Time is in short supply and the necessities of life rise to the top of the priority list and so my blog time is neglected. I console myself with "summer dreams". I tell myself that when we finish school I will make myself set aside an hour a week to read/write blogs. Perhaps the accountability of writing that down will make it happen.

Since I last blogged we've celebrated two birthdays, attended a homeschool convention, mowed grass, built hundreds of rocking chairs, visited with family and the list could go on and on. And so instead of going on and on right now, I'm going to go read your blogs and see what you've been up to.

Looking forward to being a better blogger in the future.

Julia

Wonderful Weekend

It's hard to believe that one week ago today I was having breakfast with some of my dearest friends in the world. I am blessed in the friendship department, I have many dear friends, from my past and present. These particular ladies and I have been friends for a very long time. Most of us even went to high school together. I've watched as they had crushes, then loved, and married their husbands. I've held their babies, sat with them in hospitals, and spent many long nights figuring out life and solving it's problems. I've been to Europe with five of them, Asia with one, and Central America with another. I've lived with all but 1 of them at some point. Lots of history, lots of shared experiences, lots of love.

Several months ago Kim sent out an email suggesting another attempt at a weekend together. In 1998 the same group of ladies, including husbands and a couple babies got together in Branson. We had a great time, but as our families grew and our responsibilities became more pressing, planning anymore reunions was difficult at best. This year it happened though. We simplified and stuck to just the girls. We found a very reasonably priced cabin(thanks to Butch Heath) and, thanks be to God, it worked out. We hadn't all been together since my wedding over 8 years ago. Several times over the weekend we'd walk into a restaurant and the hostess would say, "So where are ya'll from?" To which we would reply, "All over." We've all landed in different places in life. 8 ladies and 7 states. But there is something about shared experiences, the tough times of growing up together, and the great times of laughter that have forged a bond between us. The strongest bond we have though of course, is Jesus. It is our shared desire to know Him and pattern our lives after His example that keeps the bond so close.

On Friday several of us met in Lexington, KY and headed south to pick up Gaye and Kayla. This is the really cool state-of-the-art Welcome Center of TN.

Friday night we ate supper at The Apple Barn and then met up with Marty later that evening.

Saturday we went shopping. Kayla and Sonja found these BEAUTIFUL little....things. We ate at Bullfish Grill. Yummo! But mostly we did a lot of this.........


Even baby Emma laughed!

Each of us girls are care-givers of some sort. Combined, we care for and are responsible for over 200 people. That's a whole lot of pressure. While we are content with our lives, this weekend was a much needed time of low pressure and "being young again". We are so thankful for the fun time spent together.

Uppercase Living

This week is a crazy one. Monday night I was home. But that was it. Violin lessons Tuesday, church Wednesday, DQ Club tonight, Uppercase Living Party Friday, and Parenting Class Saturday. I like to be busy, but this week is a little over the top, don't cha think? I'm looking forward to each event though. I couldn't handle this every week, but once in a while, it's fine.

The Uppercase Living party this Friday is really more of an excuse to have girlfriends over. So if you live close by be sure to stop in around 6:30pm. If you don't, and you desperately need any of the beautiful wall rub-ons that Uppercase Living offers, here is a website you can check out. I'm not sure if Natasha takes orders online or not. If not, call me(618-918-8366) and I'll place the order for you. http://www.natashak.uppercaseliving.net/

Valentine's Day with Peter Parker aka Spider Man

We had an interesting Valentine's Day here in our neck of the woods. On Saturday Matt worked his normal Saturday hours from 8 to noon. At around 11:30am he was moving some old lumber and felt a prick. He checked to see if he had a splinter and there was none to be found. Almost immediately his finger started swelling. Having seen many brown recluse spiders that day while moving lumber he was pretty sure he had been bitten. We were inclined to wait it out to see what would happen. If you live in Southern Illinois you know that you don't normally ignore a brown recluse bite, but then again, some people don't react too badly to the bite. We looked on the Internet and learned elevation of the bitten area, ice, benedryl and slowing bodily movement down can help the venom not to spread. Matt did all of the above and we spent a half hour or so looking at disgusting videos of Brown Recluse bites on YOUTUBE. (If you want a gross fix go check it out. :))

The swelling remained about the same, but a few of our nurse friends recommended a trip to the Rural Health Clinic to at least get an antibiotic. People can lose limbs and such due to brown recluse bites. So we sent our boys with our trusted friends and spent a romantic afternoon in a waiting room. I know you're jealous, but not all of us can live the life of luxury and romance that I do. After a romantic stroll into the local CVS to fill the insanely priced antibiotic we picked up the kiddos. Then I whisked off to clean the church while Matt stayed home and entertained the children. I came home and Spider Man already had the spiderlings in bed. I was pretty tired so I nearly fell asleep while Spidey was reading Redwall to me.

Now you may find this hard to believe, but it really wasn't a bad day at all. Matt and I don't technically celebrate Valentine's Day on the 14th anyway. Since we were engaged on the 22nd of February we usually celebrate on that date anyway. But any day that I get to spend with my "Superhero" is usually fun. We laughed at all the spider jokes we could think of and both dozed off waiting for the nurse to see Matt. Nothing flashy or exciting, but you don't need bells and whistles when you're with your best friend. We just enjoy being together.

BTW, Matt is doing fine. He had gloves on when the spider bit him so we assume he didn't get as much venom as you might normally. He still has some mild swelling and discoloration, but no pain. We are VERY thankful. Although Josiah was disappointed that they didn't put a leech on Matt's finger at the hospital. :)

Growing Up!

Last night after we got home from our "Family Night" adventures (which included an excursion to Save A Lot, a drive by at the ATM, a splash and dash to the library, and finally a escapade at the Dairy Queen.) Josiah lost his tooth. Well, "lost" is a strong word. While at Dairy Queen he noticed his ice cream had blood in it (totally disgusting to you, but super cool to an almost 6 year old). When we got home and he brushed his teeth, the tooth got looser. I said, "Boy I hope you don't swallow that in your sleep." This was enough for him to go to Daddy, the great tooth puller of the ages, and ask him to do his handiwork. In one small painless pull, the tooth was "lost".

Josiah was so excited. We were excited for him too. However, I must admit in my Mommy's heart I had a brief sadness. My boy is growing up. Oh sure, " it's just a tooth" you say. But next it will be his voice getting deeper, and then driver's Ed and ......Well, you know. I remind myself that the reason I work so hard everyday is to see them grow up to become men. Not just perpetual boys who hang on Momma's skirt and never fly from home. Who avoid work and commitment like a plague. Men who are grown in body and spirit. SO I say hooray for the "lost" tooth, which is hiding securely in a zip lock in the file cabinet. My boys are growing up and that's how it should be. :)

Check Out This Blog

I heard Michael Yon interviewed on the radio today. I checked out his online magazine and was spellbound. He is an embedded independent journalist whose eye-witness reports give a fresh, and often differing account of what is really is going on around the world. Check it out. http://www.michaelyon-online.com/