Monday, May 14, 2007

The Other Side of the Fence



To quote one of my favorite songs from my favorite music artist http://www.samthedummy.com/


Oh what a wonderful day
Come on, admit it
be it sunny or gray
Don't you forget it
Every hour is super special
I, for one, am happy to be alive
Oh what a glorious day
I'm filled with wonder
At the wonderful way
That even thunder
Can remind me Who is holding
Every moment anyway
What a wonderful day!

We had such a nice day yesterday. I, like so many of you, was thinking especially of my incredible Mother. I know often she feels like she hasn't accomplished much in life, but her life is continuing to influence down through the generations. I am looking forward to celebrating Mother's Day with her next weekend. The boys are pumped about heading to Papa and Nanny's. It's been too long since we've made it up there, but alas a 7 hour trip with a 4 year old and a 2 year old is not what we do often, for obvious reasons.


Yesterday, we enjoyed a worshipful day with dear friends. Matt made muffins for breakfast (we always have muffins on Sunday mornings) , and I was presented a lovely gift that I have had on my wish list for quite some time. As always, the boys and Matt made me a very unique card. It was shaped like a pyramid and Matt said it was for their "mummy" because I was one of the "wonders of the world". Goofy, I know, but I loved it.
After church we went to our neighbor's (and dear friends, I might add) house for a picnic. The boys enjoyed a golf cart ride with the neighbor girls, who happen to be two of their favorite people.
I will spare you the details of the whole day, but we did have such a nice day. Both Matt and I were unable to be with our Mom's on this special day, we don't think there is anything sacred about the particular day however, so we plan to be with them both later this week.
I was talking with a good friend last week about "the other side of the fence" and it was another good perspective aligning conversation. It is, by human nature, a most easy thing to look at others and think, "now they have it all together" or "if only I had their life " or "boy, sure wish I could do what so-and-so gets to do". Earlier that day I had listened to a Focus on the Family broadcast on Singleness. This particular friend is single and I wanted to get her take on what I had heard. As I spoke with my friend we realized something, the old saying, "the grass seems greener on the other side of the fence" is so true. I had always thought of that saying as a one-way thing though. The people who have it good, are on the other side. While I would admit that the other side had a higher water bill and had to be mowed more often, it was still greener.
My friend and I realized that, the grass is not greener, it's different. In our flesh we tend to think that we're always missing something. Kind of like when my kiddos are each enjoying a snack, they both have a treat, but they want to taste the one the other has. Don't get me wrong, I love my life and wouldn't trade it, but there are times when my single/no kids girlfriends go shopping or out for ice cream late at night and inside I sigh and think, "boy their grass is really green." Then I hear my single friends say, "you get to go home to a house full of people", and I can almost hear them sigh and say, "boy, her grass is greener." The point is, it's not. It's just different, and on my side of the fence their are weeds, just like on your side. On the other hand, on my side of the fence there is a lot of sunshine and flowers, but I bet there is on yours too. So I think the point is, in whatsoever state we are in, in that we should be content. Contentment, now that sounds like a way to enjoy the grass we have. Elisabeth Elliot warned us to not lose the joy of today by always looking for the joy of tomorrow. So I'm going to enjoy my grass, weeds and all. I hope you do the same.

22 comments:

Making Memories 1999 said...

Great family picture! Also looks like the boys had a great ride. Thanks for the post. Good thoughts!

Kimberly said...

Finally a pic. that does Matt justice:) Really good. Sometimes the grass really is greener, in all honesty..but still better to choose joy. And your Mom is a winner..such a fun and giving lady!

Kimberly said...

I'm feeling paranoid...the other pics of Matt were good too...but i just really like this family shot!:)

lauralavon said...

Such a great post. Is it true that you really can't know for sure unless you've been on both sides? For sure, I didn't see it as clearly before I had experienced both. Your picture is better of the kids on the golf-cart, could you email me a copy?
Thanks!

Tara said...

Great family pic! Thanks for the phone call today. Love you so much, friend!
Also love your Mama, too. Don't know what it is that makes our mothers feel like they haven't accomplished much (well, okay, I guess it's motherhood itself that does that!), but they can't have done too bad: look at the marvelous women they produced! Aren't we the "BEST"???!?? ha

Blessings,
th

Jo said...

Julia,
Wow! Thank you for your comments! It's so wonderful to be close to all of you girls at church. It helps me to see the whole picture of marriage; the good, the bad, and the ugly! :) Okay, so I haven't seen anything that could be classified as bad or ugly, but it is neat to see that things are not always peachy. Thank you for your honesty, love and willingness to let me share in the joy of your family! :) I just finished listening to the two Focus on the Family programs. They were wonderful. Although there are weeds on this side of the fence, too...I'm not quite willing to drop everything and move to a place that has more gentlemen with similar values. I'm thankful for the fulfillment and joy of having lots of children around and wonderful friends. Yes, I too shall enjoy my weeds on this side, patiently waiting for someday when I might have the chance to try your side. :) Until then, I will trust Him! Love you, girl! Thanks for your thoughts!
Love,
Jo

kayla said...

How true that the grass isn't always as green as it looks on the other side. My husband is always very quick to remind me of price some have to pay to get their grass to look that green.

Julia said...

Just a disclaimer, I understand that some lives are tougher than others so I was generalizing about the grass not always being greener in that area, and I didn't mean to sound flippant,so sorry. However, the topic at hand was singleness and marriage and in that, I still say the grass is just different not neccessarily greener.

Jo,
Does this mean you're going to have a blogspot blog? PLEASE O PLEASE! No pressure here. :) So glad you are part of our family, you add so much to our lives and you are such a tremendous example for our boys.

Kimber;
I wasn't offended, I know what you meant about the pictures. All the pictures of Matt on this blog so far have been kinda goofy. He does look dashing in this one. doesn't he? :)

Tara;
We are amazing and I can't imagine anyone disagreeing with that. :)

Kimberly said...

I've got to say: Kayla's words on this subjest added a very wise element...tell H he is impressive:)

And greetings to the dashing Matt, and equally dashing wife and sons:)

Anita Marie said...

What a fine looking family.

Kelly S said...

What a beautiful family! Your boys are so adorable.

I try to enjoy every moment to its fullest - even the times when the house is a mess and the children are under my feet, etc. I always think, one of these days they will be gone and I will have a quiet/clean house, but will wish for the mess and fussing again!

My children have memorized the scripture verse, "Godliness with contentment is great gain". We talk about that often.

Just the other day, I was looking at someone's blog and noticed their beautiful house and how neatly the yard was landscaped and I started to feel that nudge of discontentment and said to David, I wish we could get our yard landscaped like that, etc. etc. and then it dawned on me that it was discontentment creeping into my mind and I immediately apologized and quit those thoughts. It's poison and can kill a spirit! I truly believe that is one of Satan's biggest tricks for holiness people. He knows he can't get holiness people like us to smoke/drink/drugs,etc. so he uses less obvious means such as jealousy and discontentment to snag our souls. We have to be so cautious!

Thanks for your post. Something we all need to remind ourselves of often.

Kelly S said...

Can you send me your email? Mine is kelly.s@fuse.net. ~ Thanks!

lauralavon said...

I've enjoyed all the comments on this one. So many wise women... : )

It's almost funny how we humans are; no matter what we have, someone else looks like they have it better, and like Kelly said, discontentment can set in on us. I'm thankful Jesus showed us how to deal with that one too.

Marty said...

I loved this post! You have always such a great way of wording what you are thinking/feeling! Love it! You do have a dashing family!!!

I know I have been "quilty" of looking to the other side...singleness...it was fun... no one to worry about buy myself...but that's the point...when I have these thoughts it's ALL about ME! The Lord is always there to gently remind me of the tremendous blessing I have and wouldn't trade my life for the world! Thanks for sharing!

Note about Susan...she went to the doc today and she is....well...how do you say this on the WWW? Progressing? 1CM!!!! Keep her in your prayers!

Jo said...

Hey again, girl! My address is joryder.blogspot.com. Have a great day! I'm glad to have a wise friend like you!

Derek Hickman said...

Howdy!

Sometime the grass IS greener on the other side, but by the time you quit your job, take the shortcut around to the other side of the fence, try to find a new job, leave your family and friends, go into debt, work long hours to pay off the debt, lose your patience, leave your family, lose the reason why exactly that you did all this for . . . well, then it's winter time and the grass is dead.

That's why I paint my concrete green . . .

Unknown said...

hi :D i am coffeecravingchica.blogspot.com yeah so i'm truly not addicted, but close! :P coffee is just such a fun concept lol besides i couldn't think of anything else exciting and didn't wanna use my name. love ya! see ya soon

coffeechica said...

oops, didn't realize my roommate was signed in! i am indeed not rachel! lol

CHolden said...

Hey Julia,

You are quite the preacher. It's amazing what being an alumnus of a Bible college can do for you. I like the quote at the beginning of your post. Interestingly, the only other "person" that I have heard say those lines is one called "Sam the Dummy!" Anyway, great blog, cute family.

J Luck said...

Julia,
What timing. I was talking with Libby today and while I am SO proud of her and the exciting work she is doing, I have to admit, my mind did wander and I thought of the "important" and life-changing work I used to do... and I thought of how I looked down at my shoe on the way to church last night and realized I had dried spit up on it, and how potty training and wearing big girl panties had gone SO well today... right up until the whole diarrhea incident.... and I have to admit, I was thinking that even with all this "fertilizer" my grass wasn't very green.
I really needed this post today. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Cholden;

Good to hear from you. I hope you and your family are well.(how many kiddos is it?)

Jody;

Be encouraged sister, we are potty training too, Matt took the messy one today though. :)

Barry;
Astroturf last longer and looks nicer than concrete.

Anonymous said...

Kudos to you. Enjoyed your post from your bit of turf. You're right, it's just different. Satan just loves to keep us discontented and unhappy. We've all got our weeds, and we've all got our flowers. I think I'll celebrate my side for a while.

By the way, when we talk about things like this it helps us to...ESCHEW ALIENATION! ESCHEW ALIENATION!